I wake up this morning with the shakes of spirit, worried, my mind wandering old paths, thinking about new ones and not at all certain about what’s ahead. The Jewish New Year begins this evening and, from the memories of my childhood, I worry what lies ahead for this new year. Will there be continued life for my family, the people I love? Will I have one more year? Will we have good health or bad? Will this be a productive, fulfilling year in which good work and deeds are commited, or will the days ahead not be used as well as they should? I go early in the morning to the local pool to walk and swim in the water, and to find healing; I search for comfort and pray and think about God and think about the people I love, about the people I still have in my life and the people whom I have lost, and tears spill on mornings like this when I feel there is nothing certain and I lack power and control. At the pool, I fight as courageously as possible, to fully enter the new day, to put the ghosts and regrets and fears behind, and to move ahead as best I can. If you feel some mornings the way I do today, then I wish you only good things and comfort and I send out hope that the day will be better for you, too. May we all find healing in the days ahead.
What do you do when you have mornings like mine; how do you face your uncertainty? Please share.
